How I Became The Anti-Soulmate Love Coach

I created The Anti-Soulmate Love Coach business in 2020 during the panini. In January 2020, I said to myself, "I want to be my own boss by the end of the year." I had no idea how I was going to do it, or what it would look like. I just knew it needed to be done.

Then the world shut down.

I was burnt out from working many people based jobs, so I took this time to rest and recharge.

I played a LOT of video games and watched a lot of TV. Things I didn't normally do because I enjoy going out, which doesn't leave a lot of time for the screen.

In August 2020, I felt like it was time to do something productive, so I signed myself up for a marketing course to learn how to market my business, which, at the time, was still a mystery to me as to what it was going to be.

I taught yoga full time and practiced reiki for the last 4 years before lockdown, so I thought my business was going to revolve around wellness.

When I started the marketing course, the facilitator, Morgan Balavage, said, "If you're multi-passionate and have a lot of ideas, pick ONE to focus on in this course."

Lo and behold, a voice stated loudly in my head, "You are going to be a Dating Coach for Nerds!"

Thus began my foray into coaching.

It made sense to me because I have a background as a therapist and a Doctoral level education in Clinical Psychology, and I am always the one my friends go to for relationship and dating advice.

I am a nerd, and all my friends are nerds!

It seemed like a great fit for me and for my business.

I started marketing directly to nerds, joining all the nerd groups and talking about my work to nerds I didn't know.

I was met with...resistance.

My work empowers you to be your best self, increases courage and confidence to follow your intuition, and encourages you to feel your feelings and then move on when things don't work out.

Many nerds I spoke with felt like there was some outside force that made dating difficult for them, and didn't believe that would change for them, which is in direct opposition to the work I do in the world.

So I stopped marketing to nerds. I trusted that me being a nerd would attract the clients I wanted, especially since many of my clients came from word of mouth anyway.

The clients I did have were nerdy, queer, non-monogamous, and kinky.

All people who aligned with my view of love, which comes through a relationship anarchy lens - creating relationships that work best for the people involved and not necessarily following any societal standard.

(Read the Relationship Anarchy Manifesto by Andie Nordgren here.)

There was no need to change my content. The change needed to happen in my marketing.

I brought this up to my business mentor, Julia Wells, and she said, "You could be The Anti-Soulmate Love Coach!"

BAM!

The Anti-Soulmate Love Coach was born.